Divorce can be difficult for everyone involved, especially if there is a lot of hostility and conflict involved. It can be especially hard on minor children, who have had their entire world upended. Even non-contentious ones can be challenging for them as they struggle to adjust to a new schedule, new households and a whole new way of life. Their family will never be the same and they know it.
After you have talked with your family law Hernando County FL attorney and settled everything in court, there will be a period where your kids may feel angry, bitter and resentful as a result of all the changes. As they try to reconcile themselves to their new reality, they will need your support and understanding more than ever. There are a few things you can do to help them adapt to their circumstances.
1. Don’t Assign Blame
It is imperative that you assure your children that the divorce is in no way their fault. They may feel that they bear some fault even if they don’t voice it. Also, avoid blaming your former spouse or talking bad about him or her in any way. Even if you don’t have any intention of doing so, you may end up alienating them from their other parent, which can negatively affect their relationship with him or her.
2. Be Steady
Reassure your children by acting as normal as possible. Things will be different no matter what, but maintaining some semblance of normality will help them feel more stable and secure. Maintain the same rules as usual and continue with traditions as much as possible.
3. Display Patience
Above all, be patient. Your children may act out. They may behave coldly towards you for a while. They may even direct blame your way even if you didn’t do anything wrong. All of this is because of the turmoil and excess of emotions they are experiencing. Their brains are not fully mature and they may not be able to properly process everything they feel like you as an adult can. Respect them and their emotions. Allow them to vent as long as it’s not in a disrespectful manner. Don’t talk down to them or dismiss their feelings. Instead, tell them that they have a right to feel the way you do and that you are there for them whenever they need to talk.
Minor children can suffer the effects of divorce for a long time. By remaining steady, comforting and empathic, you can help them through the difficult adjustment period.